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mood |
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 Gah, the homeworks. |
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music |
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Pulling Our Weight - The Radio Dept. |
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Call this an opportunity to procrastinate, but I'm writing it anyway, despite knowing that my Filipino play script is practically bullshit, our ComSci documentation less than half done, and my Physics and Math homeworks are practically inexistent. Heh.
I was dutifully doing (and, well, procrastinating. a bit.) our ComSci documentation when suddenly my trian of thought stopped dead in its tracks. I was staring at my freaking hell large lcd screen, with JCreator right in front of me with the codes we "made" for the ComSci calculator. In my mind, only one word came up; "Bullshit". Then my train of thought went somewhere else. Somewhere most Pisay students have probably wandered before.
I was thinking about what all these things we have was all about. I mean, sure, they're homework. They're important, somehow. But why? Why do we give up our sleeping hours to get these pieces of shit done? And so I started questioning their importance, not for the grades, not for the short term, but for the long run.
While I was taking this break, I took a small trip to Sir Martin's blog, and, specifically, this post. I found that it perfectly matched what I was thinking right now. But I managed to find some small differences with my thoughts, and this post is to make that heard.
From his "bureaucratic mummies" for "subterranean tombs", I change it to Automatons, robots, or even Myrmidons, someone who follows orders without question. With the heavy load we receive almost every weekend (or even everyday), I feel that what they're trying to tell us is to not fight what comes our way, and just endure it. Which, in all honesty, I don't like. We're talking about homework here, people.
Also, with the system as it is now, I feel that it's also trying to tell us to just do what we are give and told with unnatural perfection and without question. These homeworks are hard (try making your parents answer them) and, well, they don't really seem that important in the long run. Teachers, kill me now, but I swear, they don't really seem important after the long test, quizzes, and periodic exams that cover them are over. I'l attribute to this the fact that we don't even BOTHER to remember stuff from previous quarters. They just don't seem important enough.
Back to my main question: what are we doing these for? Well, there really is only one answer for that. Grades. I mean, for those numbers that seem to mean so much, we break our backs and spend away hours we are supposed to sleep with in front of the computer, finishing a presentation/document/report/shit. Right now, it seems like a total waste of childhood. Highschool only seems inportant now because of all the people you get to know. Besides that, nill. Maybe except some lessons that are really worthwhile.
Myabe I'm just complaining because I just can't make myslef fit (haha. size pun) in the system we have. I can't make myself an automaton who can make homework with perfection. I can't make myself a Myrmidon who does things witohut weighing them for my benefit and questioning them. Maybe that's just me; I know a couple of people who were able to mold themselves to work in our situation. I also know someone/somepople who are prefectly fitted for the type of system we have (and, honestly, one/some of them disgust me greatly about that), and that I and some other people (I think) just cant handle it and rebell against it just becasue of that. (Well, I don't, I try to fit in my own ways, but still question it.)
But still, somehow, somewhere inside me knows that the system we are in and is imposed upon us is not natural and that either it's really not the way it's supposed to be or that it's not what we long for. When we entered Pisay, eyes wide open and hoping for the best, we (well, most of us) were hoping that entering this school would mean a better and brighter future for us, with a system completely different and much more effective than where we came from. I personally hoped that, by changing schools, I would find escape from the tiring and monotonous system we used to have back in my old school and find myself in a new system, with better learning and stuff. Now I realize that I never really excaped that system we had; I just entered the same one, with heavier loads and less escape. Now, we're no longer the wide-eyed; we're the sleepy and baggy-eyed teenagers. We no longer hope for the best, we now only hope for higher grades and passing grades. Somehow, Pisay was able to dampen the hopeful, young spirit we had before entering it, and subdued us to teenagers who will just settle with what we are given and do it without question.
But then, there are those of us who are aware of what can be done, what can be changed, and what we have to do, all for the better. There are those of us who can see the cracks, the flaws, the structural damages and burns (2nd floor fire pun) that the system currently has, and have ideas on how to mend it and make it better.
Just my thoughts. And 40 minutes of procrastination.
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